It's SHARK WEEK!
The most wonderful week of the year, unless you’re a seal. So today, we’re going to learn some fun facts about SHARKS! Don’t worry, it’s still beer related. If you want to play a drinking game, take a sip anytime I say shark.
So, let’s dive right in…
Everyone knows the infamous dun dun sound, that signals a great white is in the area, and while many have come to love that movie it didn’t go over well with sharks. Many sharks died as a result of Jaws and a sudden irrational fear of sharks, that Jaws created. But today we’re going to learn that we need sharks, and they need us to survive, and they’re not that dangerous. Sharks kill on average, 4 people worldwide each year, while dogs kill 35 each year in the States, alone.
So, what the hell does beer have to do with sharks!? Well, both are best enjoyed in the ocean! But, there’s a bit more too. Here are a few things some breweries have done to celebrate sharks, and Shark Week, and a few other random facts:
- Narraganset Brewing: In Jaws, while Brody, Quint and Hooper are hunting Bruce (that was the name of the animatronic shark), Quint has an infamous scene where he chugs a Narraganset Lager, and then crushes the can. Well every year, starting a few years back, during Shark Week, Narraganset Brewing releases their very popular lager with the label from 1975. To promote this, they also have a campaign telling everyone to “Crush it Like Quint.”
- Dogfish Brewing: The most popular craft beer brewery named after a shark is Dogfish Brewing. This Delaware Brewery actually got its name from a town in Maine, where the original owner, Sam Calagione, spent some of his Summers. In this Maine town, dogfish sharks were often found in lobster traps, sometimes even more so than lobsters. So when Sam moved to Delaware, he wanted to bring a piece of Maine with him, and so Dogfish Brewing became the name of his brewery.
- Dogfish sharks were actually named after dogs, because fisherman thought they looked like dogs chasing a ball, when they were hunting fish.
- Old Ox Brewery: At the beginning of Covid, when many breweries were forced to figure out a way to stay in business without being able to serve customers on site, one brewery up in Virginia went the extra mile. Old Ox Brewery began having their beer delivered, and the delivery man was (and I hope still is) dressed like a shark! I honestly can’t think of anything that would make me happier than a shark delivering craft beer to my house.
- Evil Genius Brewery: Evil Genius lived up to their name last year during Shark Week’s 30th Anniversary, by releasing a beer called Baby Shark doo doo doo doo doo. It was a hazy mosaic pale ale, and they paired it with shark trivia, shark movies, and all sorts of shark fun during Shark Week. I wonder if they had to …drink faster, doo doo doo doo doo…. Drink faster!
- Tiger sharks: They are known as the Ocean’s Garbage Can. Many have been found with beer bottles in their stomach. One Tiger Shark near France was even found with an intact bottle of wine inside him. This honestly isn’t that crazy, considering a suit of armor has actually been found in a Tiger Shark before, but I was looking for beer and shark facts.
- Shark Drunk: Greenland sharks are non-aggressive sharks found in cold waters and believed to live to about 200 years old! They are also, like many sharks, hunted for food. Well it has been discovered that if you eat Greenland shark that is not properly prepared, you get “shark drunk!” It can even cause people to hallucinate because of a nerve agent called trimethylamine oxide.
- New Smyrna Beach Brewing: Every January there is a 5k and half marathon that occurs in New Smyrna Beach! It’s a great event filled with lots of shark education, and it’s called the Shark Bite Half! It’s called this because New Smyrna is the shark attack capital of the world! The best part of this run is as soon as you cross that finish line, they give you a shark beer glass that is then filled with Shark Bite IPA from New Smyrna Beach Brewing! And that was how I was convinced to do my very first half marathon.
In addition to the breweries listed above that have brought about an awareness for the danger sharks are in, either directly or indirectly through shark week, many other breweries have raised money for shark conservation groups. Maui, Cisco, Atlanta, Big Spruce, Ballast Point, Coppertail…even InBev’s Landshark, have all seen the need for shark conservation and raised money through their beer sales, to support groups that actively work to protect these amazing animals. Without sharks, the entire eco system in the ocean would be screwed. Sharks create a necessary balance.
So what are some easy things we can do to help sharks?! Anytime a brewery is selling a shark saving beer, buy and drink it! Also, never eat or buy anything with shark in it! EVER! Read those ingredients. Reduce your use of plastic! Recycle and reuse what you can, never litter, and learn and talk with others about sharks. Also, go swim with them in the wild! If an area is making money off tourists who want to swim with sharks, well then your local politicians suddenly want to protect them. And, if you ever see a shark stranded on the beach that is still alive, try to get it back in the ocean (or get someone who can), do NOT, use one of its teeth to shot gun a mich ultra, like some dumb ass frat kid did a couple years. It’s mean, and incredibly unhygienic. Sharks mouths are filled with bacteria, parasites and symbiotic creatures. Ugh.
So… in conclusion! Next time you’re near the ocean, crack open a beer, look out, and show some respect for these amazing creatures that come in all shapes and sizes. Then pick up your F**** trash! And pick up some of the other trash A holes have left behind! And, in the words of John Kimmich from The Alchemist, Don’t be a D-bag RECYCLE that can!! Cheers!